One more day...

if you don't count today. Gettin' to Whitefall takes forever in this tank of a ship.

About an hour ago Shadowbroker asked me if I'd like him take over flyin' for a bit, and I said yes. Truth is I'm not feelin' so good. I don't know how he figured that out; I've been puttin' on a good show of strength and resolve to stay awake and get us to where we're going. Autopilot is good, but there's Reavers out in this territory, and autopilot don't alert you to them. If I can just sleep for an hour or two, maybe I'll feel better.

It ain't 'tired' exactly...its just..well, not myself. He told me he's relieved me a few times from flyin' since we've started this leg of the journey, but I don't remember anything about that. My mind seems to be playin' tricks on me. I thought I saw my Grandfather last night. It wasn't like a dream, it was like real. I could even smell his cologne. I was more than a mite confused when I came fully around. I haven't thought of him for a long time. I only know him from pictures, so how I could smell what I thought was his cologne, I have no idea. But there he was, just lookin' down at me, and I heard him say, 'that's her'. And then I fell asleep. Strange dreams out here in the black.

For now, as I have a chance to get some more sleep, hopefully with no dreams, I should take advantage of it. Shava's brought me something warm to drink - says its good for me and will help me really relax - and he won't leave til I finish it off, so I better get out there and down it. He's very kind, that beautiful boy. I can see why I was in love with him. Those eyes are blue-er than robin's eggs. But he's a scoundrel if ever there was one. There's no safety in his arms, and I ain't hankerin' to be in them. Strange as it sounds, I still miss my Nene. MY Nene? Did I say that. He ain't mine. That's for sure. He's a man unto his own self. Ain't no knowin the ways of a real man like that.